whensexfightsback

Thousands nursing secret sex injuries

In Carnal Catastrophes on October 25, 2012 at 9:56 am

Appar a third of the Brits have had some form of sex related injury. Tea scalded cocks, rainy vaginas? From Daily Telegraph.

A survey found that around a third of the adult population – about 18 million people – has suffered an ache or strain either during or after bouts of passion.

‘Yeah, I fell 40 feet out of her vagina’

Pulled muscles emerged as the most common complaint, followed by back injuries, carpet burns, cricked neck and bashing an elbow or knee.

As many as 40 per cent only realised they were injured the morning after because they were overcome with passion and did not notice it at the time.

Five per cent of people have had to take time off work because of sex related injuries.

Two per cent had even been left with broken bones while others suffered bruised shoulders, twisted knees, sprained ankles or wrists and bent back fingers.

Despite the upholstery, the sofa proved to be the riskiest place to have sex – mainly because of the number of wine glasses and plates left lying around during passionate nights in.

Unsurprisingly, stairs were the second most dangerous place for lovemaking ahead of the family car and the shower. Other hazardous locations included chairs, the kitchen table, the lavatory and office cupboards.

One in 10 people said they or their partner had fallen off the bed during sex and one in 50 said they had fallen off a washing machine during the act.

As well as the risk to life and limb, the survey also uncovered how sex can leave a trail of destruction around the home, with bed frames, wine glasses and picture frames among possessions most at risk.

Some more energetic people admitted accidentally smashing a hole in a wall or breaking chests of drawers or doors.

Almost four out of 10 people claimed to have broken something around the house during sex with the average cost of damage touching £154.

A spokesman for http://www.phonepiggybank.com, the mobile phone recycling firm, which commissioned the poll said: “‘Sex is a risky business these days.

“There are numerous hazards in and around the home which can inflict severe injuries if people aren’t careful.

“We were amazed to find out that even the bedroom can prove a hazardous location for certain people.

“Our advice would be to remove any dangerous objects well before you plan to start making love and take care while in the act.”

Most common injuries during sex:

1. Pulled muscle

2. Injured back

3. Carpet burns

4. Cricked neck

5. Bashing elbows / knees

6. Bruised shoulder

7. Twisted knee

8. Sprained / strained wrist

9. Sprained / strained ankle

10. Bending fingers back

Most dangerous locations:

1. Sofa

2. Stairs

3. Car

4. Shower

5. Bedroom

6. On a chair

7. Kitchen table

8. Garden

9. Lavatory

10. In a work cupboard

Most commonly broken items:

1. Bed frame

2. Wine / pint glass

3. Picture

4. Chair

5. Tea cup

6. Wall

7. Chest of drawers

8. Door

9. Window

10. Vase

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